


lips, skin, unadulterated love.

by Bounteous



Series: let me lie beneath myself. [8]
Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Asexual Character, Ash Lynx Loves Okumura Eiji, Ash-centric, Boys Kissing, Cute Okumura Eiji, Domestic Fluff, First Time, Implied Sexual Content, It's Like The Honeymoon Stage Of Their Relationship Happened Afterwards, M/M, Pining Ash Lynx, SO GODDAMN MUCH, Smut, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-09
Updated: 2021-01-10
Packaged: 2021-03-13 12:14:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28653336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bounteous/pseuds/Bounteous
Summary: Aslan pines. And loves. And dreams.
Relationships: Ash Lynx/Okumura Eiji
Series: let me lie beneath myself. [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2068368
Comments: 11
Kudos: 126





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> deep heaven.
> 
> kiss the hell out of the one  
> who helps you find heaven  
> on earth
> 
> -'a beautiful composition of broken' by r.h. Sin

Aslan once used five whole pages of his journal to explain his love for Eiji. And then three more listing all the reasons why.

He typically writes about one-and-a-half on a day he feels particularly emotional. 

It included simple things like ‘Eiji can cook well’ and ‘His eyes are so wide and precious’ and ‘His attire is too adorable to handle sometimes’.

It also included things so inconveniently, so love-sickeningly abstract such as ‘One day, you’re going to be celebrated for your photography and I’m already proud of you for it’ or ‘When you get up in the morning, I roll over onto your side just to feel the warmth and smell your scent’.

Eiji is very soft in the mornings.

Aslan always wakes when he does, body and mind upset at the feeling of his partner extricating himself from his arms. In the early morning light, after Eiji raises their blinds and opens the window for crisp, fresh air, his tousled hair is framed in orange. 

During the summer months, his skin is peppered with freckles all down his back and chest. They disappear once he casually throws on Aslan’s shirt from the day before. And Aslan’s sleepy, lidded eyes trail down his figure to produce a small, confounded smile. 

Eiji will turn around, then, feeling the gaze, and pad his bare feet toward him. Give him a gentle curl of his lips. A kiss or two or three. A hand smoothing out the tangled strands of blond. A caress of his baby-soft cheek. 

Then the ethereal being is gone, carried away by duty and desire. 

And sounds of a kitchen spurring to life fill the quiet. 

Aslan reads a book or edits an essay while Eiji takes a shower. He often gets so caught up in it that the arms curling around his shoulders momentarily surprise him. Sometimes they’re accompanied by helpful suggestions and corrections to his kanji. Aslan will always press a peck to his cheek in thanks. 

Eiji heads off to work in one direction and Aslan to university in another. They part ways like Romeo and Juliet without the tragic ending, a spring in both their steps. 

_ ‘Tadaima’  _ and  _ ‘okaeri’  _ are some of the first words Aslan had ever learned in Japan. They roll off his tongue, now, like ice under the sun. They’re rarely said without another pair of lips to swallow them whole. 

Aslan likes kissing Eiji.

Likes kissing every part presented to him, wholly and unequivocally.

He likes when Eiji kisses him, too.

Likes that his arms hold him tight, keep him from plunging into the swirling, bubbling, burning depths of monsters. 

When he closes his eyes, Eiji surrounds him.

And when he opens them, jade meets melting pots of honey, amber, onyx. 

There’s so much to love about Okumura Eiji, and Aslan sometimes cries about it when he thinks too hard. When he reads a page, but can’t recall the words. When he wanders aimlessly, brewing a new batch of coffee. When he stares at the boy in question, desperately pining all over again.

They should get married.

He’d invite Blanca. He hopes the man accepts. He’d feel him even if he decides to watch from afar. 

Perhaps he’d allow Eiji to invite Yut-Lung. He’d probably throw it in the trash. Or maybe he wouldn’t. He’s changed just like the rest of them, much as Aslan wishes he hadn’t if only for a plausible reason to keep the hate fueled and burning.

He’d get the gang back together and they’d be happy for him.

He’d be happy for himself.

He is happy for himself.

He thinks he’d quite like Max and Jessica to walk him down the aisle.

Later that night, he takes a shower of scalding water and dresses in front of Eiji. He cuddles into his side, legs and arms draped unceremoniously over him. Feels the way Eiji digs his nose into the dampness of his hair, inhales, and sighs. Aslan makes his nook at his hip, burrowing beneath the blankets as the other edits late into the night.

Their connection is unparalleled and inconsequential to passersby—if a bit nauseatingly sweet.

Aslan once wanted to fade into nonexistence.

_ This, _ he thinks,  _ is much better. _

Blending together in a normalcy previously untouchable.

Enough of an impact that their neighbors greet them amicably and conversations last a lifetime. Enough of a bland, boring sort of life that Aslan no longer watches their backs like a wounded lynx.

It’s the purpose of life, isn’t it? To live as one so chooses to?


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sex, poetry in motion.
> 
> let us lie  
> beside  
> beneath  
> one another  
> using our emotions to convey  
> express  
> and act out the actions of our mind  
> body  
> soul  
> and heart  
> sex is poetry in motion  
> with a touch of love  
> adding meaning to what  
> is already beautiful  
> you and i beneath the moon  
> covered in darkness  
> let us create  
> let us write
> 
> -'a beautiful composition of broken' by r.h. Sin

Their kisses are rarely heated. 

Soft. Full of love and tenderness.

Hard. Full of love and determination.

Lazy. Full of love and minty-fresh toothpaste. 

But never heated.

Aslan, bluntly put, just doesn’t get turned on. 

He doesn’t think it’s weird. Doesn’t think Eiji would think it’s weird. But they haven’t talked about it, yet.

It’s not an urgent thing, by any means. That last thing he feels is rushed. But he’s been thinking about it more often than not, lately. 

The conclusion? He thinks he’d like to try. Just once. 

Only slight embarrassment and trepidation creep up the ridges of his spine, curling down his goosefleshed arms. 

Eiji would never judge him. That’s his mantra now.

Aslan has been strung as high as the clouds today. Clearly, something is on his mind. Eiji can always tell. He’s an easy person to read. Or maybe Eiji just thinks so.

His book has laid open to the same page for fifteen minutes. Aslan just sits there, staring off into a space only he can see. It worries Eiji. 

“What’s on your mind, sweetheart?” 

Eiji’s hand sweeps the hair away from the nape of Aslan’s neck, massaging, soothing out the tenseness and tightly coiled muscles.

He’s silent for a few moments, gathering his wits and his courage before replying, “I think I would like to try having sex with you,”

He ends the sentence as if to say more, but instead lets out a short puff of air like the sentence had socked in him the gut. Maybe it had.

Eiji blinks, surprised. “Right now?”

Aslan blushes, a rare treat that tugs at Eiji’s heartstrings and makes him want to pinch those pale-pink cheeks. 

“I’m flattered,” he says, unable to look him in the eyes, “but I was thinking tonight.”

This is not how he thought the conversation would go. It’s casual. Nothing about this topic of conversation has ever been casual in Aslan’s life, much as he’d tried to make it so. It’s strange. It’s welcome.

“Are you sure?” Eiji asks. 

That’s the first time time someone has ever asked him that. Of course he’s sure.

“Yes.” He can sense Eiji’s hesitance in the way his hand has ceased its ministrations, now hovering a safe distance away. “We don’t have to if you don’t want to you.”

Eiji’s face turns incredulous. “Baka, I should be telling you that!” A beat. “I want to, I’m just afraid of hurting you.”

Why is he so ashamed of his admission? It makes Aslan’s heart swell, not constrict. 

“I don’t want to hurt you either.”

They meet each other’s eyes, then. Speaking without speaking. Loving without tangible action. 

Eiji’s lips quirk up. “How do you say we are ‘same coin, two different sides’?”

“‘Two sides of the same coin’?” Aslan breathes a short laugh, fondness laced within.

“Then, I will try with you. Tonight,” Eiji acquiesces.

Aslan has never been more nervous in his entire life. It feels weird to not feel absolutely terrified. It feels even weirder to have these feelings come from a place of concern for his partner rather than himself.

They ate dinner, washed the dishes, brushed their teeth. Now they stand across from each other, neither knowing where to begin first. 

It dawns on Aslan that he’s going to have to take charge. He will never admit that a small, tiny part of him was hoping Eiji would automatically know what to do.

“Have you ever had sex before?” He asks, carefully watching Eiji’s reaction.

He appears suddenly sheepish, but answers truthfully, “Ah, no.” He perks up. “But I have done research!”

“Aw, brushing up on your studies on how to seduce a man?”

Eiji grabs a decorative pillow and throws it at him.

Aslan swallows. “Um...take my shirt off, please.”

Eiji complies. He watches his every movement. Watches the way Eiji steps around the bed, moving closer and closer. Watches the way Eiji waits until Aslan nods.

His heart pounds the second Eiji’s fingers curl up underneath the bottom of his shirt. They lift, slowly, knuckles brushing along the planes of his stomach, his chest, his neck. His shirt drops to the floor and Aslan stands there feeling okay. 

“Yours, too.”

Eiji complies, but stops. “Do you want to?”

Aslan shakes his head. “No.”

Aslan is breathless by the time Eiji stands before him shirtless. He’s so much more beautiful than Aslan could ever strive to be. Not that he would. His hand twitches one, twice, stays. 

“Would you like to touch me, Aslan?”

“Yes.”

Eiji gently grabs Aslan's limp hand, bringing it to his chest in a mimic of their journey together. A strong, steady heartbeat. Grounding. Eiji is his ground. 

He moves of his own accord. Traces his fingertips along the pliantness. Admiring the muscles, the ridges and valleys, the sharp and the soft. Touches the scar for the first time. He wonders if Eiji can see the sadness in his eyes.

He drops to his knees, but it’s different this time. He needs a better angle. Nuzzling his face at Eiji’s hip, he lets his lips linger over the white tissue. He presses a kiss there. An apology and a promise. 

A hand reaches underneath his chin and guides him to look up at Eiji’s cloudy eyes. A thumb brushes away a tear from his own eyes. 

When he stands, a warm, ready mouth meets his. With eyes shut, he feels nothing but Eiji. 

It’s bliss. True bliss.

Aftward, beneath a tangle of covers and a haze of something newly discovered, Aslan holds Eiji to his chest. They breathe heavily, Eiji’s head bobbing up and down in time, and Aslan feels oddly sated. Not in the way people do after sex. A different kind.

Aslan has to speak or he might combust. “That was nice.”

Eiji snorts. “Just nice?”

“Okay, it was quite possibly the best thing I’ve done a long time.” Aslan rolls his eyes. “Is that enough to fill your big head?”

Eiji lifts his head to look him in the eyes, using his chest for balance. “I hear a ‘but’.”

“But I’m tired of sex. I’m sorry.”

Eiji shakes his head, pressing his smile to Aslan’s frown before settling back into his chest. “That’s alright.” It is. “That’s perfectly alright.”

**Author's Note:**

> Support my ko-fi if you enjoyed my writing! https://ko-fi.com/bounteous


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